Xavier Jared


Two brothers on personal development, philosophy, and being awesome

Twelve Ways To Be Happy


I’m a pretty happy person. I’d like you to be happy too, so I’ve compiled a list of the best things you can do to secure a first class seat on the happy train.

Eat Breakfast. You were fed a lot of bullshit as a kid. Something that was not bullshit though was breakfast. Hopefully you were fed this, or at least fed the information that breakfast was a good idea. You’re body is like a car with a stomach and a digestive system. Would you really try and start the stomach-car without putting food in it!? Then why would you start the day without putting food in you? You’d get nowhere, you’d have no energy, and you’d be really hungry all day. Eat breakfast.

Stress Less. Stress leads to unhappiness. Therefore if you are not stressing you aren’t being unhappy! Ta-da! Seriously though guys, what is causing stress in your life? Are you overworked? Worried about your health? Stuck in a bad relationship? Always having money problems? Well this item is a two-for-one. Happiness and stress are related. Do as many things on this list as you can and not only will you be happier, you’ll stop worrying about these things and stress less!

Quit Your Job. Unless you’re an astronaut or race car driver consider quitting your job. When you really think about it jobs don’t have a lot going for them. You work away at them for forty or so years—everyday—then you’re too old to have any fun. Sorry old people, it’s true. What if you started living your life the way you wanted to right now? Don’t worry about where the money will come from. We’re like rats in a psych experiment, except instead of repeatedly pressing a button to get a tasty food pellet we go to work every day to get money. Break out of the cage and do what you want to do. You’d be amazed at the opportunities that open up if you follow your heart. Want proof? Xav just quit his job and look what he’s up to.

Go Vegan. It’s a scientific fact that Vegans are ten times as happy as people who aren’t Vegan. Go look it up. I wouldn’t lie, the Internet doesn’t let you. Vegans are all super attractive, never get sick, eat amazing food, never feel tired and help save the planet. Ok, I guessed the ten times bit, but we are happier. Science could probably figure it out but he’s a busy guy. Everything else is true though. You’ll look amazing when you eliminate all the unhealthy food from your diet—getting sick becomes a challenge with all the tasty fruit and veggies you’ll be eating. You’ll have a ton more energy, and you’ll know that your lifestyle causes no harm to animals and is heaps better for the environment. Oh you’ll live longer too.

Be Awesome. How do you do that? Read. everything. we. post!

Get a Hobby. We do a lot of things that I think are pretty dumb. We get educated, get jobs, buy cars and houses. Don’t get me wrong, all of those things can be awesome but it seems like we just do them because that’s the way things work. Hobbies also fit into this category. We all assume that they’re good things to have. Well hi-five humanity! I don’t know how you did it but you managed to get something in the manual for modern living that isn’t a terrible idea. Hobbies are great. You get to spend time playing around with stuff you love doing and you get to meet other people who like doing the same thing. +1 hobbies.

Get Another Hobby. Already got a hobby? Get another one. Get another five. Here’s some to get you going.

Exercise. There are so many good reasons why you should be exercising that I could write another list. You’ll look great! I keep saying it but don’t tell me you don’t want those abs, everyone does. So go and get them. You’ll feel amazing when you achieve your goals. Running 5km for the first time or even just getting to 10 push-ups will put you on top of the world. When you exercise your body releases endorphins. Endorphins make you feel tops so you’re gunna wanna get some if you are keen on getting happy. Having sex and eating spicy foods also cause your body to release endorphins so get some of that too.

Get Up Early. Why waste your life in bed? Getting up is not even as bad as everyone makes it out to be. Once you get over the first day or two getting up becomes a breeze. You’ll have so much more time and feel heaps motivated. Roll out of bed and go for a walk or run and you get double happiness points.

Don’t Drink. Or at least drink less. Your friends won’t make you feel bad. Are those one or two “social” drinks even worth it? By all means drink yourself into a coma when it’s required: weddings, birthdays, office break-ups, but drinking when you don’t need to just makes it harder to be happy. You might a get a bit of a buzz but the next day everything is just that little bit harder. Waking up on time, eating right, exercising, actually most things on this list. So be smart kids and don’t drink!

Get Off Facebook. It’s a waste of time. Start logging into lifebook.

Laugh. At freakin’ everything. Train yourself to see the humour in the world. So often we become negative nancies and get upset over everything. Start laughing at things instead of complaining. Not only will you feel great but I won’t have to listen to you talking about how bad your life is because your meal came ten minutes late. I may have just gone against my own advice there. But c’mon, who does that!?

There you have it. Twelve guaranteed ways to be happy. If you don’t wake up tomorrow and start vomiting concentrated happiness all over the shop then I don’t know what else to tell you. Have fun being stuck in sad town; the rest of us are going to be toting around on the happy train. We’ll wave next time we roll through.

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